There’s a “stats” page in the admin section of this site where I can see things like how many people look at the blog, where they were referred from, which pages got the most traffic, and all kinds of other fun info. One of the things that I can see is what people have typed into search engines to find my site. These are always the funniest. I get stuff like “when do i firs shave” or “is mensa a joke”, that kind of stuff. However, I saw something particularly retarded down there yesterday:
Is someone actually trying to cheat their way in to McDonalds? This is too awesome.
I had to dig deeper, so went to Google, typed in “mcdonald aptitude test answers”, and hit search. Here’s what popped up:
Sure enough, there I am, number two on the results. Number one seems to be of little relevance, but number three, oh there’s a gem. Apparently McDonalds has hints for their own interviews, but they’re not really hints. It’s more like an insurance plan to make sure they get people that won’t be smart enough to get a better job later. The best ones are:
4. On the day.
Make sure you leave plenty of time for your journey – plan to arrive about 15 to 20 minutes before your interview time. Check that you have your application form, mobile, map (if you’ve never been to the restaurant before) and of course, car keys or fare money.
Hummm, what’s the word I’m looking for…. oh yea… lololololololololololololololololololololololol don’t forget your car keys??? that’s more ridiculous than internet slang. Or how about this one, my personal favorite:
1. Refresh your memory.
Look at the copy of your application form so you can remember how you answered the questions. Take it with you to the interview.
They just assume that you lie on your resume, so at least you should keep your story strait. Fucking ridiculous, WHAT IS THE WORLD CUMMING ON TO!!!!!!! Look, long story short, if you have to cheat your way into a shit job at McDonalds, you should just stay there, where you can’t harm the rest of society. So next time you buy a burger and some dumbshit kid fucks your order up, just be glad he’s not fucking up your investment banking instead (yet)…