Tag Archives: internet

in case you didn’t believe me

I can’t make this stuff up.  Seriously.  I don’t know what’s funnier, the fact that someone turned to Google for coital disrobing advice, or the fact that my site came up in the search results.  In fact, I didn’t even really believe it myself untill I doubble checked, and sure enough, number three:

 

the internet… ROTFL

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america online killed my baby

I was snooping around work the other day, and while looking over a coworker’s shoulder I saw this picture:

Wow, that broadcast does look horrifying, but news worthy?  I don’t know.  Living in an area where most murders don’t even make the news, I find it hard to believe that this guys goofy face would make it on it’s own.  Luckily my coworker had just stood up, leaving his computer vulnerable to my attacks.  I scroll up to find this headline at the top of the page:

Awesome, I had to learn more.  So I read the whole article on AOL, and a couple of things really stuck out to me. Continue reading

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intoxiblogariffic

 

so i’m drunk as hell right now, and my addiction to the internet is such that the only thing i want to do is blog. FUc’kinG LAME!@@@!!!!!! yea, i;ve sunk to that level. amyway it’s funny how we do the same shit all the time, but when we’re drunk it’s suddenly more fun.  do our lives really suck so much that we need to be drunk to enjoy them?  NO!!!!!! i’m breaking out of the loop.  i;ll get drunk on my terms from now on thank you very much.  I m doing just what i would be doing when i’m sober, listening to “Mr. Nigga” by Mos Def and writing dumb crap on the internet at 12:15am when I have a meeting the next morning.  tight.  the only difference is that when I’m sober i think it’s a bad idea, so i ocasionally stop having fun so that i can sleep enough to do lame shit later in the day.  Wow, WAAAAAOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW.  anyway, i forgot where i was going with that, but check this out:

 

that’s the first thing that pops up when you type “math dinosaur orgy” into google images.  also Aphex Twin is the greatist musician of our time.  dummmmm… George Clinton is awesome, and ix’m having troubble typing on this new mac.  also having troubble sleeping and not letting drungs rule my sleep cycles.  caffeine in the morning, alchohal at night, and nicotine to deal with how unhealthy it is.  THE SECRET IS OUT, anyway. yea,  Drunk Blogging, it’s like drunk dialing the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

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oops, we fucked up time

I woke up yesterday morning in a hungover stupor.  Hours later, feeling a little better, but still utterly confused, I decided to make my way home.  I glanced at the clock in the dashboard only to find out that it was an hour later than I thought.  This couldn’t be right.  I reached for my phone.  That had the time that I thought it was, but it was dying, and therefore not to be trusted.  Plus, the iPod was corroborating my car’s story.  “Not to worry” I thought “I’ll figure it out when I get home”.

IF ONLY IT WERE THAT EASY!!!

But no, it’s not.  I came home to discover that my alarm clock had reset itself in the night, and I had offset my other alarm intentionally, some how.  It was an effort to wake myself up in a panic (I won’t get out of bed otherwise), but it backfired.  Next, my computer.  It agreed with my phone, almost, but it’s always wrong about everything, so no help there.  THE INTERNET!!! It would have to know, so I asked it.

Yea, guess what else “isn’t that easy”. Continue reading

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episode II: attack of the internet

So when did we stop using the internet, and start letting the internet use us?  Am I the only one who wants to kick Al Gore in the balls every time I log on to my computer?  Yes, there is a wealth of free information on the internet.  Yes, the free exchange of ideas is healthy.  Yes, I too have become overly dependent on it.  But seriously, people need to stop placing so much value in 1’s and 0’s for a change.  You know that’s why our economy is falling apart right?  And as if that isn’t enough, check THIS out:

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