I have now discovered the joys of drinking on an airplane. WOW! It’s the only way to fly. Let’s just say that planes aren’t my favorite things in the world, but with the cunning use of alcohol, they get a lot easier to deal with. My flight to LA left at 5:40am on christmas morning, by about 8:00 we were landing in Denver to change planes, TURBULENCE!!! Also not my favorite thing in the world. Luckily I was seven bloody marys into my morning at that point, and all I could think was:
“At least I’m going to die in first class listening to the Thong Song. This is awesome.”
I’ve seen the end, and I liked it. Well, until they cut me off five drinks into the next flight anyway. By the time I got to grandma’s house and had a couple glasses of wine, I didn’t even know it was christmas. I now know why they invented lounge chairs.
A couple of days ago one of my more ignorant coworkers was going off about god stuff, as usual. I forget exactly how it came up, but he said something along the lines of
“well everyone worships da same god, just in different ways. It’s da Christian god, some people just don’t know that”
When I told him that there were polytheistic religions out there, his response was “yea, but they all dead now”. Hummmmm… Ok idiot, you know there are a lot of people out there that don’t believe in a god at all right? He didn’t understand. “no they just be callin him somethin else”. This is so fucking frustrating, I could have a more productive conversation with Helen Keller. Anyway, after much bickering, he hits me with this:
“Look, there is only one god, and that’s his name, God. OK? If you call him somethin else, then you goin to hell. Aight son?”