the top 10 cool things about “Babylon A.D.”

babylon a.d.

 

I watched “Babylon A.D.” last night, and though it was not a particularly fantastic movie, it definitely had it’s moments.  So here they are (in order of lamest to coolest):

pshttt… humans

 

rainbow http://www.errordactyl.com

I’m not the biggest fan of humans, I’m just going to be up front about that one.  I know, I know, I’m a human and I have human friends that I like, but i think that’s kind of on par with when you accuse someone of being racist, and they respond with “I have plenty of black friends”.  They’re still racist, and I still hate humans.  I mean, what the hell do we do?  We’re pointless!!! We’re not even a link in the food chain!  We’re just the ball at the end of it, dragging everything else down with us.  Fuck humans.  The only cool thing we have ever done is music (and pyramids).  Music is awesome, but at the same time, it really isn’t anything at all.  It’s just a concept, existing solely in the minds of other humans.  Even when music is played, it takes an other human to interpret it as more than just sound.  A dog doesn’t know the difference between music and the humm of an electric light.  So without humans, music isn’t real, it sucks too.

the errordactyl coolness aptitude test

Welcome to the errordactyl coolness aptitude test, or the ECAT for short.  The purpose of the ECAT is to determine just how valid you are to society.  I tested it out yesterday for the first time on my two friends Patrick and Anthony.  Below is the test, followed by the answers, and the transcripts of my conversations with them.

TO TAKE THE TEST, SIMPLY CHOOSE WHICH THING IS COOLER:

1 ) freakishly tall people vs. freakishly short people

2 ) motorcycles vs. siamese twins attached at the penis

3 ) those extreme fish that live in super hot water vs. the NASA plane with backwards wings that can fly out of our atmosphere

4 ) Ronald McDonald vs. the alien-Sigourney Weaver hybrid from the “Alien” movies

5 ) the sun vs. boobs

6 ) persians vs. the tooth fairy

7 ) alcohol vs. the color brown

8 ) non-anime cartoons vs. cold stuff between -40 and 0 degrees Celsius

9 ) Mayans vs. the printing press

10 ) hagfish vs. butterflies

11 ) hitler vs. cigarettes